My Surrogate Moms

I am in a pretty unique situation here in that my friends come in a wide variety of ages. In Atlanta, I basically had friends all around my same age (22-25 at the time). This was great and we had a lot of fun together, but I don't think we really solved any of the world's problems, other than figuring what bars the cute boys went to. However, in Brussels I have really enjoyed the age range of friends that I have here.

I have my young group of friends that are between 25-30 years old who don't have kids and have the energy to go out and try new things. They are great friends for the obvious reason that we are in the same life stage and share common experiences. However, this group is slowly dwindling because we have recently had four friends give birth in one week!!!

I have learned a lot from my friends between 30-45 also. They all have kids and pretty tight schedules, and you never actually finish a sentence when you are around them (because of the kids) but they are still great friends. Sometimes I think I have learned a little *too* much from them about child birth and child rearing. But at the same time, because I have learned so much from being around them, I think I will (one day...a long time from now...) be a much more prepared mother than I ever would have been just going through it blindly only having friends my same age (and experience level) as a first-time mom.

Next are what I call my surrogate moms. They are between 50-65, and whenever I mention my age (27) they say, "My daughter/son is your same age!" As much as I know what my parents are going through during this "sandwich generation" time, it helps to hear that my other friends are going through it too and to learn how they are coping with life changes. I have definitely heard more than I wanted to know about bifocals, menopause and the ups and downs of a marriage that has lasted 30+ years. But I also think hearing these things have given me a real perspective on life. I know that a marriage won't always be fun, happy times, but I also see the commitment to life these women have shared with their spouses, and how that has brought them through the bad times. I have come to respect even more all that life can teach you and how you really do become wiser with age. Sad to say, but I have also realized that I should be really happy with my body right now because it won't be like this forever. No matter what the age, I have heard all my friends talk about how their bodies keep changing with age and it gets harder and harder to fight fat and gravity with each passing year. The good news to that is that I won't be spending these years thinking I look too fat!