Ironic That I Have Green Eyes...

On Friday I went to a Welcome Fair to represent the American Women's Club. It was held at the NATO Support Activity Center (NSA) here in Brussels. Since it had to do with NATO, I thought I would be dealing with an international group. Well, once I got inside the NSA building, (after standing in the cold for 30 minutes to get full clearance) I soon realized that this building was just basically the Support Activity Center for all American military people. I had originally been pretty unhappy to have to go to this fair, but after I realized that for lunch I was getting either a philly cheesesteak and chips or BBQ, baked beans, deviled egg and macaroni and cheese all for only three dollars (yes, dollars not euros) I was more than happy to stay. (Currenty $1.00 equals .82 euro cents.)

A civilian friend of mine has been to the Commissary before with a friend of hers who is a military wife. She had warned me what the experience of being in an American military bubble within Brussels would be like, and thank goodness I heeded her advice. I walked into their mini-commissary (basically a little larger than a big gas station) and was met with pure and total jealousy. Not only did they have Kraft Mac and Cheese in a box, but they had the microwavable version too. They had Bud Light, chocolate chips, Crisco, brownie mix, but most of all......they had Double Stuff Oreos. AND everything was in DOLLARS!!!!!!! And this was just the mini-mart, can you imagine the real store?!? I can't believe I am saying this, but my eyes actually welled up with tears when I saw all of this stuff. I cannot remember the last time I have been this jealous.

I love being in Belgium and am really enjoying the experience. However, seeing all of these things just really gave me a pang of homesickness. The hardest part to accept though is that all of this stuff is just a 20-minute bus ride away, but I will never get to touch any of it. When I first got to Belgium my mom spent $40 just to send me a box of Oreos because she knew how much I loved them. FORTY DOLLARS. I have searched this city high and low looking for Double Stuff Oreos but to no avail. Little did I know that they are just up the road for only $2.50 in a place I will never be able to get to.

Keep in mind that I have already started a list of things I want to buy in the States and bring back the next time I am in there. Kyle and I will be packing an extra suitcase the next time we go just to be able to bring back cold medicine, printer cartridges and other things that are either too hard to find here, or too expensive to buy in euros.

So after wiping away my tears, I decided that I was DETERMINED to get a job in some area of the military/NATO so that I could get privileges into these stores. I went to the HR booth of the fair and was basically flat out rejected. Because of stupid Belgian laws, if I had approached the HR guy within 90 days of my arrival in Belgium then I could have easily gotten a job. However, since I have been here ten months, the Belgian government sees me as a permanent resident and I can never get a job with them now. Even though the HR guy had made it clear that I could never get a job with them, he decided to tell me all of the benefits I would have gotten if I had contacted him within 90 days, which just basically added salt to the wound.

I have a few friends here with Commissary privileges and yes, I am sure if I really wanted to, I could ask to join them on one of their trips there. However, with the size of our apartment and freezer, it is not like I could load up on too much stuff because I have no where to store it. I am more jealous of the fact that they can just go there whenever they want to. I am now starting to understand why so non-Americans resent Americans and all that we have and do not appreciate.

All of my life I have never really had to go without things that I wanted, and I think most people reading this blog would be in the same boat. However, I don't think I have ever experienced as much flat-out rejection as I have in Brussels. Basically, I have to accept the fact that I can never get a fully legal, well-paying job here within the Belgian community and now I can never get a job here with the American Military.

I just finished reading "The Kite Runner" and was reminded of so many people that were once doctors, lawyers and professors in their home country. However, they came to America (to flee war) and ended up having to work at a gas station or under the table as a maid or nanny. Luckily for me, I know that I will only be here for five years and that eventually I will stop getting the door slammed in my face. But I can't imagine what it must be like to have such knowlege, but know that for the rest of your life you will be doing menial labor and never be able to return to your home country. I am definitlely getting more of a taste of the real world than I ever have before. As much as I hate it, I think it is a good thing and I think a few more Americans need to taste it too.