Tears in my eyes

When I was in first grade, my parents attended the first parent/teacher conference of the year. My teacher told them, "Emily is a good student, but I do sometimes find her quietly sobbing in the corner." At the time I apparently had a little trouble being away from my mom for the whole day. Fortunately I have adjusted to spending more than seven hours away from my mom but unfortunately I have not lost the 'quiet sobbing' trait. In fact, I was thinking today about all the places I have quietly sobbed and the list is quite long.

It is something I hate about myself, but I just can't stop. I feel the tears start to burn my eyes and no matter what I try to do to stop them, once they start I just can't get them to stop. I have cried in school, at work, in front of my boss, in umpteen bathrooms and basically any where else you can think of. I don't do it for pity or to get my way -- I just can't stop the tears once they start. The worst part is that the main things that bring them on are not understanding something, being criticized, worry and a lack of sleep. Needless to say, I have a feeling that I will be quietly sobbing my way through these next few months.

Luckily Kyle has gotten used to this side of me and doesn't freak out the way a lot of men do when they see tears. He knows that the best way to stop them is a hug, a Double Stuffed Oreo, a Coke and putting me down for a nap. After any combination of those things I am usually back to my normal self (except for the red, puffy eyes and splotchy face). I recently read that crying releases endorphins and it helps you relieve stress. So if you ever see me quietly sobbing, don't worry, it is just the lazy woman's way of doing yoga.